"I have no faith in human perfectibility. I think that human exertion will have no appreciable effect upon humanity. Man is now only more active - not happier - nor wiser, than he was 6000 years ago." -Edgar Allan Poe (1809-1849), American author, editor, and poet.

Cheating is not the best option for a test and it should not be the first. However, sometimes when you are really struggling and desperate cheating can be the only option.

This method works well, especially if you are seated were no one is behind you. Bring a mechanical pencil to school with you the day before the test, so it is not too obvious you are cheating.Write some notes on a gum wrapper, or small piece of paper. Roll it inside the pencil, where the lead would go. Bring the mechanical pencil to the testing class with you, but make sure there is only half a piece of lead in the pencil. Do all the questions you know first, then, make it obvious that you have run out of lead. Open your box of lead, take one out, then open your pencil. Hide the pencil in your desk, look at the notes, then close the pencil. when you are done with the notes, and test, roll some chewed up gum in the wrapper and throw the evidence away

Write the necessary information on your fingernails with a pencil, stick your hands IN YOUR POCKETS when you walk into the test if you have many notes on your nails. Then during the test when you come to a point where the notes on your nails will be useful, pretend to pick them. Then once note is used stick your finger in your mouth and lick your nail. This makes your notes disappear. This method is great during Geography tests, because you can make maps out of your fingernails (when put together) then quickly get rid of them.

This method works well if your teacher does not make his/her own tests. As long as the tests given to you always have a slightly perforated left edge, that means they are ripped out of a test book (even if they don't have the edge, try and see if it looks like it's a copy. Sometimes schools are cheap and only give teachers one test book, then have them copy the test).

Make sure they are test book tests. Once you are sure that all the tests you have been given up to this point are official tests, just go to any of the numerous teacher supply websites or eBay, and search for your exact book name. They will have it 9 out of 10 times.

Then choose the teacher edition, then buy it. This will get you 100's on not just tests, but quizzes, homework, even class work. To use for a test, just memorize the answers (this isn't that hard as you can take as long as you need; the book is yours!!!) and then on test day, just copy them down. To use for class work, same thing, or just don't finish it in class, bring it home for homework, then copy it directly out of the book. And of course for homework, well obviously jut copy it out of the book.

Warning: This can be a little expensive. Best bet is to get your group of friends to all go in on it together, to greatly reduce the cost to each individual. Then don't tell ANYONE outside of your group that you guys have the book. And keep it at whoever's house that it is less likely to be discovered by a parent. Then whenever a test is in the near future, have him/her copy the necessary pages and distribute them out to the rest of the group. You will need a credit card to make the purchase though, so bribe an older brother or cousin. My 3 friends and I did this from halfway through 9th grade all the way through to the very end of Senior Year, starting with just the Math Class book in 9th grade, to every single subject we had a class together by 11th.

If you are taking a scantron test, (fill in the bubble tests often used in standardized tests, but also given by teachers) it will be graded by machine. However, you can fool the machine. If you are stuck between two answers, simply fill in both bubbles. The scantron will pick up on the darkest bubble. When the test has been returned to you and you are checking over it with the class, pay attention when they give the answer to the double-bubble question. If the answer that the machine marked was correct, simply erase the incorrect bubble to make it appear as if you changed your mind on the test. If it marked it as incorrect, slightly erase the incorrect answer and tell your teacher that the scantron machine made an error and marked the less-darkened bubble. This works more with gullible teachers; some have been able to fool teachers many times with this method. However, do not do this on every test as your teacher will catch on eventually.

Put all needed information in a note on your cell phone. Put your cell phone on your knees, where the teacher cannot see it, and when you need an answer, look down at the note you typed. Make sure no one calls you. Or get a friend that can TEXT you the answers on the text, but be careful with teachers!

Note: Only works with thick rubbers :Before the test (at home, for example), take a rubber, and use a long, thin object (rulers work well) to saw through the middle of the rubber (the width, not length). Don't go so far as to snap it in half. Gently bend the rubber so that the middle is revealed. Write notes or anything else in the middle, and let the rubber go back to its normal position. During the test, simply take the rubber out of your pencil case, bend it in half (pretend to be fiddling about), memorise the notes, and write them down.

Note: This must be prepared beforehand. Go to the toilet, and choose a specific stall. One that you're sure you'll remember. Go inside, lock the door, and open the top for the toilet tank. Usually, the water level doesn't fill the tank all the way, so use that dry space to tape your notes to. Ask to go to the bathroom during the exam, after you've finished doing all the questions you know. If you're not allowed, accept it. Someone can escort you to the bathroom if needed. Go into the stall you chose, lock the door, and take a look at the notes. Try not to make much noise if there are other people in the bathroom. Flush when you're done, to make it sound authentic, and go back and write down the rest of the test. Go back to the stall after the exam to destroy the evidence.

Do you know an Asian language such as Japanese, Korean or Chinese? If so, this is the technique for you! Note: This works best if you are not Asian yourself. You must prepare for this the night before the exam. Before the Day of the Test: Figure out what you want to write down in English. Once you have decided what to write, take a pen and write your notes on the back of your hand in your Asian language if you are writing Japanese but are only familiar with katakana, then write in English, (e.g. "conclusion" becomes "konkurushon" [??????].). Try to be creative and make it look like the characters are just decoration. Go to the bathroom and rub the pen off a little - but make sure you can still read it!

Check later on in the evening that you can still understand your writing. On the day of the test, wear long sleeves so that it is not TOO obvious you have writing on your hand. Voila! You're set! Teachers almost never suspect an Asian language! The same method can be used for a 'tattoo'. Just write the information in Asian on your hand, leg, etc. with a temporary ink pen few weeks/days before the exam (so the teacher won't note the 'tattoo' on the day of the exam) and try to be creative so you make it look like a real tattoo, and after that you can keep it for another few days after the exam has past before you remove it (so you won't be suspicious if you have rubbed it out just after the exam day).

This one is recommended for multiple choice tests featuring letters or numbers.

Find a smarter classmate who will let you cheat from him/her. Agree some foot signals beforehand e.g.: One quiet step of a foot means A or 1. Two steps means B or 2. Tapping your feet using your toes means by 10, and tapping your feet using your sides means by 5.

This involves a hat, small handwriting, and good acting skills. Get the "this will never work" look on your face, or a similar look that could be used as a prerequisite to taking one's hat off. Take your hat off to wipe your brow with your sleeve. Your concealed page of notes should be visible inside the hat, where your forehead sits.

All you will need is a pencil, paper, and the test! This especially works if you have a multiple choice test. Do all of the questions as possible. Write down the questions you don't know and slip it in your pocket. Tell your teacher you didn't finish it. If he/she tells you to come in at a break time or at lunch, "forget". Bring your paper home, and look up the answers, and write your answer down. The next day, when you get the chance to finish the test, pull out your paper. Revise the answers as necessary, and write them down!

This is a trick to do in the previous method. Do the "I'll finish it tomorrow" method. Convince your teacher that you could finish your test at lunch. Come in at lunch and ask your teacher if you could eat lunch in the classroom. If you cannot, then this will not work. Bring your lunch in a lunch tray. If your lunch tray is box-you can fold your answers and slip them inside the tray in a position where the teacher can't see. If you have a flat lunch tray, then you must place your answers behind something, or bring a piece of tape and tape it to the back of your milk or juice carton, if you have one.

This is best for formula etc., and is done quite simply. Take a wide rubber band, stretch it out really widely and place books inside to keep it from getting small again. Write your notes/cheats on the stretched out rubber with a black ballpoint pen, making sure to write your letters as close as possible, while it's stretched out. Let it return to its original size, and the notes will just look like black boxes, not cheats. Wear the rubber band as a bracelet to your test, and when you need the answers, just stretch the rubber band out, and when done, let it snap back.

For tests allowing calculators, use any sort of text-based memory to record all the equations, notes, theorems, proofs, etc. Create a fake, password protected program and use the text box. No teacher will ever be able to access it. However, most exams do not allow programmable calculators and invigilators may check.

If you need to know a few things in a certain order or a list of things, before the teacher hands out the test and you are given a minute to study a little. write the answers on your desk only in a spot where you can see it if the glare from the light hits it. Once you are finished wipe it off for no evidence.

If you are sitting close to a smart friend and the test is of multiple choice type then you can ask him/her to keep a continuous log of their answers by typing the relevant numbers continuously without a stop in between(EX: 2314 would mean ans1)2 or b, ans2)3 or c, ans3)1 or a, ans4)4 or d). Five minutes before the end of the test ask the invigilator if you can borrow his/her calculator as yours just stopped working or you just forgot yours altogether. At this point your friend must act as a good/kind student and offer his/her calculator without any hesitation. Chances are that as just 5 minutes remain the invigilator will not be too bothered about it and then you can copy the answers in the same order. But don't get the order wrong, even by mistake, because then you will surely fail.

With a cheap microphone, do a voice recording of any and all notes you could need for the exam. Keep every chapter, section, etc. on a different track so it can be easily accessed. Store the audio file on the music player. Ask if you can listen to music while you work. Use the "I did all my studying listening to my music, so 'state-dependent' theory says...blah blah blah" excuse, if you must. If listening is not allowed, put an earphone up your sleeve, or wear a hood. (It is easy to conceal a small earphone without a conspicuous hood if you have long hair.) Listen to your "music" during the test.

Write whatever notes you need in a text file and put it on your media player (may require software) or create an image file of the notes and load it. Some players have a feature which allows you to write lyrics for songs - this feature can be used to store information on tests. Wear a pair of baggy jeans to school. Make sure your desk is directly behind the person in front of you. Put your feet up against the back legs of the seat in front of you with your knees high to conceal your lap. Place player in your lap with your fly open. If your teacher comes near or suspects you, slide it into your pants. (Note: works best for teachers of the opposite sex, particularly girls with male teachers.)

Note: This requires serious preparation and work. It also helps if you are good with Photoshop. It only works if you are allowed to take a bottle of coke or similar into the test. You need to have access to a scanner Peel the label off a full coke bottle. Scan the label into an image-editing program like Adobe Photoshop. Delete the nutritional information and type in whatever text you need. Print out the label and stick it onto the bottle. Take the bottle into the test and place it so you can see the information.

When you need, look, but don't stare, otherwise it will seem suspicious.

Note: This one can get you in serious trouble... not for the faint-of-heart. But of course, you've already made the decision to cheat, so getting in trouble probably doesn't faze you. Take the test home with you. Do not turn it in. Get help, and finish the test at home. Bring it back to class with you for the next lecture, along with several different colored pens and markers. When you see the teacher's grading method: color, style, etc., grade your own test in the same manner. Either the teacher recollects the tests to record them, or when the end of the semester comes around, and you have no score recorded, you can bring in evidence that you actually took the test and got graded on it. If you don't feel like doing that simply don't turn the test in and claim that they lost it. Ask to retake it on a later date.

This is the second easiest way not to get caught (the first is not to cheat in the first place). Note that the person giving the test may have caught on to the trend in bathroom cheating and may not let you go. Have a calculator or some exam notes in your pocket and while taking the test, write questions down on a piece of scrap paper. Go to the bathroom, whip out the cheats and work out your answers.

For Essay Tests

This is a brick wall in the cheating world. You can either try to copy or BS your way through it, but one thing will get you the points: Teachers are usually looking for specific words or phrases to be used, and they usually tell you them in class the day before the test.

Know the teacher, know the buzz-words, and be able to BS it well. Sorry, no silver bullet here.

Alternatively: Get some plasters or stickers and write down your information, buzz words, etc. on the sticky side of them. Stick them on your hand, wrist or arm on exam day. When the test comes, lift up the plaster to reveal your helpful hints. Another way is the day before the test write out the test in the middle of a refill pad or whatever you use. bring it into the class on the day of the test. Then begin to write some rubbish about Spongebob Squarepants or something and when she tells you to hand your test in, wait till the crowd goes up and rip out the essay you wrote the day before the test.

Manage to obtain a copy of the test, this may end up you having to get into trouble before hand to visit the teachers room, get a mate to ceate a diversion that allows you to grab a copy.  Mark the correct answers on this copy. When you get the actual test, write some stuff on it and pretend to be thinking (or scrambling if it is a different version). Just before tests are collected, pull out your original copy and stash the other; and turn in the good test. If it is a different version, you may still be able to get away with it by turning in the wrong one, and when asked, say it was the one they gave you, and stick to that (this works best for essay type tests).

Write out your exam notes on a small piece of paper before the test, and slip the paper into the shaft of your pen. During the test, you can just take apart your pen and read the information needed. As always, make sure you don't get seen.

Buy some gum before the test - not in a package, but some that comes individually wrapped. Open the package and carefully unwrap a stick of gum, so as not to rip the wrapper. Take a small sheet of paper, write your info and put it under the gum, wrapping the stick again. Put it back in the pack on top and take a few out so it looks like a pack you've had for a few days. During the exam, when the proctor isn't looking, eat the gum and read your info. Pretend to get tired of the stick and put it back in the wrapper so you "destroy" your cheat notes and thus don't get caught.

Alternatively: Get a pack of gum that comes in a circular tin, like Ice Breakers Sours gum/mints. Cut out a circular piece of paper the size of the tin and open the "to share" side to read the notes. Only have a few pieces of gum in there, though, so that you won't look suspicious when you throw it away.

This usually only works with small notes, and if you are an athlete (football, skateboarding) this works even better. Get the biggest Band-Aid you can. Write the some notes on the cloth-like part of the band-aid. Red (blood), brown (dried blood), or yellow/green (pus) works best, but you could really use any color. Put it on your elbow or knee. Scratch the Band-Aid as if it itches when test time comes. Then, act like you're going to fix your band-aid. Pretend you're looking at the wound, but don't pull it completely off (you don't have a wound!). Look at the answers. Do not take the band-aid off during school! Administrators will see you're faking.

Write down all the information you need for your test/exam. Shorten it as much as possible.

Go to a local tattoo parlor and ask the artist to tatoo the information to a part of your body that can easily be covered, such as your upper arm.

When the test comes, just lift up your sleeve to reveal the tatoo and the information.

This method is just as good as actually learning the information, as the information will never leave you.

Before the test, get a good sheet of notes, formulas, complicated questions and answers, etc. and have it all summarized on a sheet of paper. Take the sheet and glue/tape it on to the bottom of the desk that you KNOW that you will be sitting at. Place it so that the top is at side of the desk furthest from you. During the test, simply drop your pencil under the desk, reach for it, look up and enjoy your answers (do not stare for too long or the teacher might notice).

Print out a small strip of paper the thickness of the desk with the answers and put small strips of tape on the ends. Tape the paper to the edge of your desk or the desk closest to you, and if the teacher walks by, cover it with your arm.

This works best in the back of class.Before class, when the teacher isn't there, write formulas etc. on the desk in pencil. If the teacher walks by, just slide your paper over it. If you're not in the back of the class, or if the teacher periodically patrols the desk aisles, try writing very, very light on the desk so it doesn't stand out. Instead of writing out entire words or sentences, just use one letter (preferably a starting letter) to remind you what the full answer is, and just spread them out across your desk, instead of writing them all in one clumped area. Another good place to write is in the small indent where you can put a pencil at the edge of your desk, as it is both difficult to see that spot while walking by, and you can place a pencil over your cheats without suspicion. When class is over you can simply erase the notes. (This works extremely well with light colored desks and pencil; use of pen isn't recommended.)

Before class attach double sided (circled) tape to the desk. Sneak a normal sized sheet of notes. Read off your lap. If you feel threatened, pop your knee up and attach the paper to the top of the desk. Remember, less motion means less visibility.